Is Friendship Between A Man And A Woman Possible?
There is no consensus how to develop friendship. It depends on the circumstances, lifestyle, and the length of the relationship. It is especially challenging in the male-female relations. A rapport between two people is influenced by certain conditions that determine its success or failure. The process is largely based on behaviors, reactions, and coincidences.
Friendship is a very valuable gift in life. It accompanies love, but it also can occur by itself. The important thing is the ability to separate the two categories of feelings, a challenging task in cases when two opposite genders are involved. Sometimes, the distinction may be outright impossible.
The entire process from the first meeting, though getting to know one another, and developing new emotions is lengthy. It's only up to the two individuals on what level their bonding stops. Sometimes it may be love - more often just lust finalizes friendships between a man and a woman (not only Polish of course).
The first meeting requires only a handshake; later long spontaneous conversations make time fly by in a wink without serious plans for the future. Subsequent more advanced levels of bonding allow for sharing deeper thoughts and emotions. This is when a male and a female start to express understanding, acceptance, admiration, affirmation, encouragement, and finally the need for intimacy. In some cases, friendship turns into jealousy, which indicates that the feeling was in fact love not friendship. Love and friendship are two beautiful feelings, as is the combination of thereof on one condition that one feeling does not destroy the other one. Intimate relationships born after long friendships are susceptible to more types of problems not obvious beforehand. A friend does not criticize for drunken outings, or scold for being late, or forbid to go out with friends for a beer or football game. In intimate relationships these become problems and are grounds for anger and dissatisfaction. Friendship teases love for love's restrictions; and love complains that friendship stays away from it. As a result both feelings suffer.
This scenario takes place in most cases when unaware good friends nourish the seed of love in their hearts. That seed is in every person's unconsciousness and lies in wait for favorable circumstances. Unconsciousness consists of our hidden desires, fantasies, emotions, and memories, which we have no awareness of at all times. It surfaces also in our dreams that sometimes come true. The risk that arises from this process is emergence of hatred. When emotions dominate, the world may turn upside down.
Referring to the previously mentioned lust - is it unnatural that two opposite sex people start looking at one another in terms of physical attraction to the extend that they start to desire their bodies and end up in bed? After the crazy night, they cannot however look into one another's eyes! Why? A sudden twist in their relationship - it no longer is my best friend. This wonderful person with whom I could talk about anything now is just my lover.
Male-female friendships are very difficult. I don't claim that they are impossible, but they are rare. Such friendships are hard to keep unselfish and anything can happen...
Chances of friendships between a man and a woman would be better if friendship followed love not the opposite way. When the passionate love ends, the partners would still have very close friendship to hang onto. It is impossible to forget shared experiences especially when two people know about themselves everything. As Aristotle said, friendship is one soul in two bodies.
Another citation says that friendship between a man and a woman is like a walk along a very narrow land separating the bay of knowing one from the ocean of love. So, a high tide tends to flood the piece of land.