Married to a Polish-American Guy

I got married in the year of 1999. I'm a Polish woman and left Poland when I was 19 years old. Now I'm 28 and I'm happy to be a Polish wife of an American man. Tim was born in the state of New York and only his grandfather was Polish. His mother was an Irish immigrant who came to the States along with her family on a ship (it was right after the war started).

Tim is a typical American male - he is "big", he's got a nice truck, and he likes American food. Or - I should rather say - he used to like this stuff as now he's more likely to ask me to prepare golabki or pierogi for lunch :D). He likes sports (baseball and basketball), he likes playing with kids, and his favorite kind of music is jazz.

Tim thinks his job is the most important thing in life. He's almost a workaholic, which doesn't make me very happy. True - the job and the money are crucial, but I feel he and most his American friends take it much too seriously because they tend to spend over hours in their workplace without any hesitation. I cannot complain because as a Poland-born woman I have almost everything I ever dreamed of, but sometimes I feel lonely among this big house, two kids, and a few not-so-close friends. I remember that when I was in Poland I felt I was less stressed out even though here I don't have to worry about anything.

What I miss is the Polish culture, hospitality, and nature. Here, when I go to the nearby woods for a walk, I cannot smell the nature because everything smells the same. In Poland, I could really feel with my whole body the smell of the forest. I think that's because Poland is still less polluted than the area I live in. Also, in my opinion people here are more likely to do something to show others they can do it, for example buy a third car even though he or she doesn't really need it. This may be just my imagination though and I know Polish people are not as they used to be either.

Other than that, I feel good to live in the US and have an "American husband." I know some Polish women living in Poland cannot even afford to buy basic things like food or clothing and I know I should appreciate what I have (fortunately, my husband doesn't tell me that as he says he truly loves me and I shouldn't be grateful for that as it is not his merit). But I didn't marry Tim just to be better off. I just liked him and he liked me, and other things didn't really matter. I liked the fact his ancestors were Polish because it just feels better to know he may really cherish what I do (you cannot change genes after all :).

What I would like to suggest Polish girls or women who may think about getting married an American guy is that they (those guys) are not much different than other guys, but they need a little more understanding as far as their job is concerned. In other words, Polish women who go into a relationship with an American guy need to accept their sometimes down-to-earth and realistic ideas that may not correspond well with social life. Other than that, they should always look for similar features because it is the most important part of a long-term, happy, and loving relationship.